AfterSchoolEnrichment

Beware of Over Scheduling Kids, Experts Warn

After-school activities, lessons and sports are great, but wise parents will make sure their kids aren’t getting overwhelmed and stressed out. One or two extracurricular activities at a time is reasonable for most kids. Adults might think that kids’ lives are carefree and full of free time; however, a recent KidsHealth KidsPoll shows that kids have quite a different opinion. Of the 882 kids ages 9 to 13 who were polled, 41 percent reported feeling stressed "most of the time" or "always" because they have too much to do. The survey found that even though responses differed when kids were asked how they spend their time outside school (doing homework, structured activities, watching TV), most agreed on one thing: 77 percent wished they had more free time.

Parents and kids both to blame

Who’s responsible for the busy schedules kids keep? Is it parents? Kids? Both? When kids were asked who chooses their non-school activities, the majority (62 percent) reported that they choose most of their activities, while 29 percent said that they and their parents choose together. The survey results suggest that parents need to help kids decide how to spend their free time to make sure kids have plenty of unstructured time to unwind.

"Don’t be afraid to give kids exactly what they’re asking for – more free time," says D’Arcy Lyness, PhD, practicing psychologist and behavioral health editor for KidsHealth.org. "Unstructured free time helps kids learn to entertain themselves, fosters creativity, and helps them discover the things they enjoy doing. Whether it is time spent socializing with peers, reading a book, playing a game, or daydreaming, downtime helps kids recharge their batteries and de-stress."

Warning signs, what to do

How can parents tell if their child is too busy? The telltale signs are easy to spot:

Does your child have to leave homework unfinished or complete it late at night because there’s not enough time in the day?

Is your child often rushing through meals to go somewhere?

Are you feeling stressed about getting your child from activity to activity?

Does your child complain about having to go to practice, games or lessons?

Is your child getting to bed on time?

Is your child’s overall mood starting to suffer because of a busy schedule?

What can parents do? If you think your child is overscheduled, it may be time to make some changes. Try these tips:

Set priorities. Help kids learn to make choices about the activities they’re involved in. There are lots of interesting activities to choose from, but it’s not possible to do it all. Parents can help kids learn how to pick and choose, how to say no to some things, and how to budget time and energy.

Check in on homework. Homework can start to slip when kids are too busy. Take time to make sure your child has the skills to organize, focus, and get the job done. Checking in also lets kids know that parents are interested and can help if needed.

Schedule downtime. It’s important to make sure your child has unstructured free time on school nights and weekends to regroup, relax, and slow down the pace. Leave a little cushion of time between commitments so that you can help your child set a pace that’s not so busy.

Be a role model. Watch your own pace. If you’re overbooked and always running between your own activities, you may be teaching your child the same. Find ways to work downtime into your schedule – and include your child. Play a board game together, go for a walk after dinner, or read a story.

About the Survey

The KidsHealth KidsPoll on "Are Kids Too Busy?" surveyed 882 children ages 9 to 13 across the United States at nine member sites of the National Association of Health Education Centers (NAHEC). The survey was conducted by researchers from the Department of Health Education and Recreation, Southern Illinois University, Carbondale.