Selection Perfection

Finding the Perfect Holiday Gift

by Jill Miller Zimon

You know the winter gift-giving season will be here soon when Sunday newspapers look more stuffed than a Thanksgiving turkey. As you make plans to fill stockings and stomachs with tradition and joy, consider these tips to help you satisfy the children on your holiday gift list.

Gather, Record and Interpret Data
Start with age guidelines. Robyn Freedman Spizman, author of The Giftionary A-Z Reference Guide for Solving Your Gift-giving Dilemmas-Forever! (St. Martin's Press, May 2003), believes that parents disregard age if it's a "hot gift [even though] they really need to pay attention to the warnings and disclaimers" because safety is a priority. Spizman also says to look for products with levels of play that allow kids to use it differently at different ages. Many electronic games and board games offer this feature.

Then think about gender. Stevanne Auerbach, PhD, also known as Dr. Toy and the author of Smart Play (St. Martin's Press, February 1998) and Toys for a Lifetime (Universe Books, November 1999), advises that givers respect kids' preferences for dolls and a dollhouse, or trucks and radio control vehicles. Otherwise, choose unisex gifts such as board games, music or puppets, which please children of both genders.

Ask the child's parents, the child, siblings, friends and other relatives about the intended's interests, likes, dislikes, hobbies and talents. What don't parents allow or want their children to receive? Spizman suggests, "Ask [the child], what don't you want? What's the worst gift you've ever been given? What do you have too much of?"

Record this information on a spreadsheet. After you label the columns with Age, Gender, Favorite Color, Hobbies, Collections, Likes and Dislikes, and the rows with the names of the lucky recipients, fill in the blanks with the information you've gathered.

Examine Your Options
To refine the possibilities, Dr. Toy recommends the following questions from her web site, www.drtoy.com:
w Do the toy and package match each other? If the expectations created aren't met, children can be disappointed.
w Will the product frustrate or challenge the child? Does it offer an opportunity to think, learn something new or practice something beneficial? Will it be too difficult for the child to use?
w Is the toy/product well designed? Is it safe? Are there any potential hazards such as sharp edges, parts that can be swallowed or loose ties? Is it non-toxic? Does it meet Consumer Product Safety Standards? Will it take rough treatment?
Will the product teach? Does it promote positive self-esteem, values, and cultural awareness? Does it offer practice in eye-hand coordination or fine and large motor skills? Does it teach communication skills?
w Will the toy help to nurture childhood? Can children use the product alone? Will it help them gain independent skills? Does the product help children express emotions and experience concern for others? Is there any violence, sexism or negative aspect to the product?
w Is the toy fun? Will it make children laugh? Relax? Feel good? Auerbach reminds us that, "Learning is a lot easier and more enduring if it's fun!"
Is the toy affordable? Does the price match the value received?

Divide and Conquer
If you think the holidays have become a free-for-all when it comes to gift giving, try these techniques to help reduce excess gifts, duplicates and unwanted items.
w Assign each relative a different category of gift: book, music, puzzle, board game, clothing, craft, personalized item, blocks, trains, workbooks and so on.
w Pick a theme for the holiday and tell everyone what it is (sports, outside fun, science, language, etc.).
w Let the parents buy the gifts and receive reimbursement later. The giver often feels relieved and more confident that the child will get something desired.
w For Chanuka, have one set of relatives be responsible for the first night, another set for the second night, and so on. You can choose to give or not give on those nights, whatever suits the traditions you want to create.
w Have givers combine their efforts, either for one large item such as a train set table, or for a series of related items such as train track, trains and train station.

Let the Games Begin
Because there are as many places to find gifts as there are gifts to find, you don't need to stick with the retailers featured in advertisements. Most catalogues, toy stores, bookstores, sporting goods stores, discount stores and wholesale warehouses have websites to peruse. Less common places include museum shops, trade journals or websites for hobbies such as soccer, dance, stamp or coin collecting, stationery stores, craft stores, or bed and bath shops. These frequently have catalogues and/or websites also.

Craft fairs, flea markets and garage sales can surprise you with unusual finds. Look in the classifieds for antiques and other collectibles or, if you are more adventurous, try an online auction website. Use word of mouth to find home-based businesses that offer personalized items.

Also browse or buy from manufacturer's catalogues. Dr.Toy's website maintains a "Company Links" web page which lists hundreds of vendors. Also, the website Findgift.com takes you directly from an item you like to its manufacturer's website.
If you can afford it, Spizman suggests you try a concierge or personal shopper to whom you can fax a list and have them pull items for you. Other timesaving options include in-store wrapping - often free - and shipping services, which sometimes cost extra. Last but not least, don't forget to ask for a gift receipt if the store provides them, and try not to forget to include it with the present.

The Child With the Most Toys
As adults, we know the goal is not to be the one with the most toys, but rather to have our newspaper inserts make a bigger contribution to our town's recycling bin than to our credit card bill. Follow the advice and you should be on your way to reaching these goals.