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Foster Your Teen's Positive Body Image by Cathy Keller Brown When I was in middle school, a neighborhood girl developed anorexia. She was a popular, bubbly and athletic teenager, the kind of person we younger girls wanted to emulate. Yet, when I saw her for the first time since her eating disorder had developed, I thought I was looking at a ghost. I was terrified by the sight of her pale skin stretching across her bones. I looked away, hoping she wouldn’t recognize me. Many recent magazine covers have shown super-thin celebrities like Nicole Richie or Keira Knightley who are reported to be anorexic. Unlike my neighbor, these women flash smiles at the camera, drawing attention because of their sexiness and confidence. Through the paparazzi’s lens, even eating disorders seem glamorous. As I have learned, however, the disease doesn’t make its sufferers glamorous. Instead, it kills off their vitality pound by pound and calorie by calorie. According to the National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA), "in the United States, as many as 10 million females and 1 million males are fighting a life-and-death battle with an eating disorder such as anorexia or bulimia." Onset occurs before age 20 for 86 percent of people struggling with eating disorders, reports the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders. Researchers don’t know for sure why people develop eating disorders, but there are a variety of risk factors. The Academy for Eating Disorders’ list includes a history of dieting and concern about weight, a history of depression or anxiety, and genetic and biological factors, such as abnormal serotonin levels. Because eating disorders can be so devastating, parents whose children are at risk need to encourage a positive body image and healthy attitudes toward food. As Dr. Ellen Rome, M.D., head of adolescent medicine at the Cleveland Clinic, explains, "If the gun is loaded, you want to make sure the environment is not aiming and firing." Here are some ways that parents can help: Focus on being healthy "Children live what they learn," Rome explains, so a diet-addicted parent likely will raise a diet-addicted child. If a parent diets frequently and bans particular foods, children can suffer from being denied a food that may be crucial for their development and from receiving the message that food is bad. In addition, NEDA reports that, in some people, dieting can develop into a full-blown eating disorder. Rather than dieting and eliminating particular foods from a diet, emphasize the importance of eating a balanced diet that incorporates healthy foods. Dr. Lucene Wisniewski, clinical director at the Cleveland Center for Eating Disorders, suggests emphasizing "food for growing vs. food for fun," as she does with her family. Both are necessary and important in our lives, and by encouraging your children to include both, you can promote healthy eating without creating a dangerous association between food and guilt. Downsize fashion magazine collection Consider what you have lying around the house. Are all of the magazines on the coffee table filled with articles about how to lose weight or get a better body? There’s nothing wrong with trying to be healthy and fit, but if that’s all your kids see, they may be internalizing the message that having the perfect body is a top priority. Magazine covers showing picture after picture of super-thin, stylish and beautiful women can encourage women and girls to feel bad about their bodies and to believe that they can’t achieve their goals without being thin. Dr. Rhonda Richardson, associate professor of human development and family studies at Kent State University, suggests that parents avoid leaving fashion magazines lying around the house. She explains, however, that it’s best not to ban them altogether because forbidding something can make it more enticing. If children read fashion magazines, parents can help them become critical readers by talking about the ads and stories and helping them interpret the messages being presented. See people for who they are Wisniewski encourages people to greet one another by saying, "It’s good to see you," rather than, "You look great." That simple change shows that you’re focused on who the person is rather than what the person looks like. Try to do the same with your children. Focus on their inner strengths rather than their outer attributes. Even complimenting kids on how thin they look can be problematic. One former anorexic from Cleveland explains, "I had always been told how thin I was. When I started to gain a few pounds in college, I began dieting and then spiraled into an eating disorder because I felt so much pressure to stay thin in order to be liked." Gail Kopelowitz, licensed independent social worker and program director of Laurelwood Hospital’s Eating Disorders Unit, also has found that even lighthearted comments about weight can be devastating. Some of the members of her therapy group attribute their obsession with their weight to having been teased when younger. In sum, focusing on your child’s inner gifts, not their appearance, can serve as a powerful defense against a pervasive problem. Kopelowitz suggests encouraging interests, such as sports or music, that help children feel good about themselves. By focusing on what makes your child unique and special, you will have an easier time teaching them that healthy, happy people can come in different sizes. Sidebar: Resources It may not be possible to prevent eating disorders, but parents can successfully create an environment where kids feel good about themselves. It also is vitally important to be aware of the signs and symptoms of eating disorders in case a problem develops. Consult the Web sites listed below, and if you suspect that your child is developing unhealthy attitudes about food, seek help from a professional. Intervening early can save your child from a lifelong, and potentially fatal, struggle. www.nationaleatingdisorders.org Cathy Keller Brown lives with her husband and two daughters in Northeast Ohio. |
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